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The Vintage Contessa

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LAST DAYS with MOM.

November 14, 2017 91 Comments

MAY 5th……..CINCO de MAYO!

LAST year 2016 working on her JEWELS!

 

COLORING CLASS

I found it interesting WE GO BACK IN TIME the older we become.

She seemed to ENJOY the COLORING!

THANKS GIVING last year when WE ALWAYS Did the CHRISTMAS PHOTOS!

HAVING A SPECIAL MOMENT!

MY MOTHER was a BIG ANIMAL LOVER as I AM.

We once hid a ROOSTER from MY FATHER in the BASEMENT for a few months!

I remember I begged to STOP at the Chicken Farm on the way to MONTEREY to see my FATHER’s MOTHER every month.

SHE FINALLY RELENTED!

WE called him BERTRAM the BANTI!

WE thought we had a CHICKEN!

2016 CHRISTMAS PHOTO

 Headed out to the CHRISTMAS PARTY at work……….in 1985.

My CAT……………. JETE beside me as he always slept in my ballet slippers!

I so wanted to be a BALLERINA!

Just NOT in my CARDS!

MY MOTHER MADE ME OPEN MY EYES  and told me in THREE “C” words ,”HE IS CUTE………. CHARMING AND HE CAN COOK!”

But I will save THAT STORY for another DAY…………..

JUST know for now MY MOTHER FOUND MY ROMEO FOR ME!

There were a few trips to the HOSPITAL the last 6 months.This was MOTHER’s DAY 2016.

NOT MY BEST MOTHER’s DAY nor HERS…………

What made my DAY was seeing my YOUNGEST SONS DEAR FRIEND’s photo on the wall of the EMERGENCY ROOM!!!!!!!

 

HE WAS AN ALL STAR and I couldNOT have been MORE PROUD as I knew THAT KID!!!!!!!!!

I had TEARS in MY EYES as I snapped this photo to send to MY NICHOLAS and MY ITALIAN!

He wasNOT at work the DAY we arrived!

Had he been things would have gone a bit MORE smoothly I am CERTAIN!

I also spilled THE BEANS about his up coming wedding!

None of his CO-WORKERS KNEW ABOUT IT!!!!!!

 

 

Look how well MY FLOWERS matched her OUTFIT!

That was BY LUCK!

She too was GLUTEN FREE and I always tried to bring a TREAT!

 

This was taken about a week before she passed……..

 

On Monday night she fell out of her bed.

She was left on the carpet for over FIVE HOURS.

She had rug burns all over her body as the skin gets thin as you age.

I found this out the next day in the afternoon………one of the STAFF members of her place of residence decided that it wasNOT RIGHT and got her off the FLOOR!The reasoning I was told from the Hospice people as it was THEIR NURSE who did this was because he had ordered a HOSPITAL BED to be delivered…………that still had not arrived on TUESDAY AFTERNOON while I was there.Once the bed arrived her place of RESIDENCE informed MY NURSE that BARS on the hospital beds are not ALLOWED!If you know me…………….you know the ANGER that came FOURTH from my MOUTH!I was like a GENERAL Throwing orders here and there getting her put back in her own BED where she would be MORE comfortable and SAFER as I had two people round the clock in her room at this point!Another BIG WHO-HA was the day she died HOSPICE took her off ICC which meant NO NURSE BY HER BEDSIDE!Only the CAREGIVER who I had hired more like a BABYSITTER.I had words for the manager of the facility who is about 30 years old and told him what I thought about NO BARS ON THE BED!He informed me it was AN ASSISTED LIVING HOME not a hospital!

Another incident occurred when she fell the first time………..AS people get older there are necklaces and now bracelets one can wear to PUSH if HELP is needed.I spoke to the HEAD TECH MED YOUNG GUY about getting one for my Mother the morning after the SECOND FALL.I was expecting it to take about THREE days ………it took THREE MINUTES.This was not OFFERED to us after the first FALL and was not an item that needed to be ORDERED!WHY WAS IT NOT OFFERED AFTER THE FIRST FALL…………..this was than used for the HOSPICE nurse and my CAREGIVER to ring if they needed HELP from other STAFF members………it came in VERY HANDY!

Her last day was a difficult day…………….she wanted OUT of BED and would hold her hands up and say “PULL ME UP” she wanted to sit up with her feet on the FLOOR!Her back HURT from the FALL and it was bruised badly…………my assumption was she was getting up to go to the restroom when she fell.At one point she told me her back felt like it was breaking!The gorgeous young man would tell her” MOM,roll on your side and I will massage your back!”On her last day he had her positioned on her side with a pillow between her knees and a pillow under her arm…………..she finally fell asleep about 4 in the afternoon.

I was called on Friday morning to say the breathing had changed!

I was en-route in POURING RAIN.

This was about 10 am………

MY MOTHER REPEATED THROUGH OUT THE DAY…….”Please may I get up?” “I don’t want to be sick.”

MY MOTHER’s last words to me were “WHY ARE YOU PUNISHING ME?”

By afternoon they thought she might live through the weekend……………..A SOCIAL WORKER showed up as did a CHAPLIN and the HOSPICE DOCTOR who came bursting in CHATTING AT A HIGH LEVEL………..I had NO idea who this person was and I was TIRED.

I told HER SHHHHH!!!!

She continued to speak in a loud voice!

She took one look at her and said maybe we have another day……..

By this time the DEATH RATTLE had started…………..but they did not tell me that!I had heard about this from other friends who had gone through the same thing with their Mother’s.But did not remember at the time it was happening to MY MOTHER!

DEATH RATTLE:Terminal respiratory secretions (or simply terminal secretions), known colloquially as a death rattle, are sounds often produced by someone who is near death as a result of fluids such as saliva and bronchial secretions accumulating in the throat and upper chest.

I decided to go HOME at 8:15 pm……….to get a good night sleep and come back in the morning.Also my CARE GIVER told me people die on their backs not on their sides!SO, between the LOUD DOC saying we may have another day or TWO and MY CARE GIVER SAYING she is not in the right position I felt better about leaving!

It was not an easy decision to make…………..

 

AT about 11:30pm the HOME phone rang.

I was UPSET with MYSELF!

WE were there by midnight!

WE waited for the HOSPICE NURSE to come and OFFICIALLY PRONOUNCE HER DEAD!

WE THAN waited for the TATTOOED Mortuary MAN to arrive.

THE ITALIAN HELPED HIM…………..

THE WRAP JOB WAS AMAZING TO WATCH………….

He used THE BOTTOM PINK SHEET…asked first if he could; I said NO!

I had my reasons………

The ITALIAN LOOKED AT ME AND I SAID YES!

YOU see that was MY MOTHER in ME kicking in………..

Her sheets were EXTRA DEEP as the mattress was so THICK.

Not easy to find and they are not CHEAP!!!!!!!!!!

MY MOTHER had GREAT TASTE………but she was a bargain shopper………

JUST LIKE ME!

MY MOTHER’s BEDSIDE LAMPS now reside on MY KITCHEN TABLE!

(I have asked the ITALIAN to make them battery operated.)

LET THERE BE LIGHT!

A DAILY REMINDER and perfect for a LONG WINTER’s TABLE……….

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91 Comments

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  • Cheryl Ireland Hooper
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 8:59 AM

    Dear Elizabeth ,
    My sincere condolences for the loss of your Mom . Hoping all your wonderful memories of her comfort you and your family at this sad time .

    xo,

    Cheryl

  • Jennifer Connolly
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 8:58 AM

    Dear Elizabeth, You were a loving and devoted daughter! I’m so sorry to hear about your Mom. Sending prayers and hugs to your family.
    xo

  • Bungalow Hostess
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 8:51 AM

    Thank you for sharing your lovely pictures of your mom. My heart goes out to you in sympathy…losing a mom is very painful. I hope in time that you will find comfort in the many happy memories you shared with her and in the meantime lean on those who love you and accept all the offers of support that your friends and family can provide.

  • Foolishfun
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 8:07 AM

    I am so sorry it was not easier for all of you. Sending you love

  • webadmin
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 7:04 AM

    I am so sorry for your loss. It’s hard to watch our parents change before our very eyes. My mother has Alzheimer’s and it’s a difficult job we have as daughters.

  • Libby
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 6:12 AM

    Those last few weeks, or days, or months are so difficult. But in the end, you do remember all the wonderful times. My Mother died over five years ago and it was a difficult time indeed. But now…well, I think of her almost every day and all the good times we had (she was a difficult woman!). My husband and I joke about her and the way she said and phrased things, all the time. In a good way, mind you. She adored my husband. I know that she is here, somewhere, with me…especially in the garden! And that is a good thing!

  • SB Chica
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 6:11 AM

    What a sweetheart Momma – you can that she had pizazz in her beautiful face. You’ll have great memories of her I’m sure. A very sad moment in life and I’m not looking forward to it. Peace for you, Contessa.

  • LA CONTESSA
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 6:08 AM

    VIA EMAIL:
    Hi Elizabeth
    I just saw tonight your post about your mom I’m so very sorry about your loss.
    She was a amazing woman, funny and kind like her daughter!
    remember when she told us it’s just as easy to love a rich man as it is a poor man. Funny
    Hope your ok Elizabeth it was wonderful you had her so close to you and your family. I love your Christmas photo from last year with her and your boys. it’s so hard to loose our moms, my mom died a year ago and I miss her much.
    Sending lots of love
    Xxoo
    A

  • Lisa White
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 6:06 AM

    Elizabeth, You are in my thoughts as you carry this loss so heavy in your heart. I know how much you loved your mother and how much she has contributed to your life. Our precious mothers….we are blessed to have had them. Good fortune has smiled on us since we were born. I wish I could be there in person for you, to listen to your stories and see the moments of her life as you describe them. Remembrances of her will call her back to you and when the world is done with us…our mothers will be waiting for us.

  • LA CONTESSA
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 6:05 AM

    My dear Contessa,
    I’m really sorry to read your mum left for another world, space, time….
    Your post is full of love and this love, believe me, will keep her alive in your heart.
    I’m in a hurry, sorry for that, I just want to make you know that I’m thinking of you and holding you in my arms.
    Love
    Elena

  • Katharine
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 5:42 AM

    He used THE BOTTOM PINK SHEET…asked first if he could; I said NO!

    I had my reasons………

    The ITALIAN LOOKED AT ME AND I SAID YES!

    I just love picturing this scene… can see it and hear it perfectly.

    What a team you two are… lucky mom to have been able to be with you two for so long.

    Onward and upward… as I know you know how to do.

    Love and hugs…. K

  • Tara Dillard
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 5:31 AM

    P B & J, a friend signs off with. Peace, Beauty and Joy. May this trinity dwell in you for every memory of your mom.

    My mom lives at home, gave her the gift of a hand-rail for her bed, and non-slip bath mat last Christmas. Did not realize, per the snit-jerk in your story, it was a hospital item and not for the home. Goodness, that empty humanoid vessel not even smart enough to be a doofus.

    So, mom gave away bed rail & bath mat. Of course she fell in bathroom, and my sister had to call 911 to get her lifted up, more than once. Pure Sonny/Cher, and the beat goes on….

    PB&J for you, shazaam.

    Love her lamps on your table.

    Perhaps print your post and take to owner of the hospice business.

    Garden & Be Well, XO T

  • debra@5th and state
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 5:30 AM

    oh Contessa, death is difficult but when it is one’s mother, it is doubly so. she raised a wonderful and caring daughter.
    love and hugs to you
    debra

  • VALERY
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 4:51 AM

    I cried for YOU……..I FELT YOUR PAIN…….!!

  • D. A. Wolf
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 4:46 AM

    I am so terribly sorry for your loss, Elizabeth. How fortunate your mother was to have you, and you to have her. And to have shared good moments – so many – and to have them captured in photograph is also such a gift.

    Hang on tight to your beautiful family. Let them love and console you even more.

    Thinking of you and sending love.

    xo

  • barbara
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 4:35 AM

    Death is nothing at all . . . I have only slipped away into the next

    room . . . I am I and you are you . . . whatever we were to each

    other, that we are still.

    Call me by my old familiar name, speak to me in the easy way

    Which you always used to. Put no difference into your tone; wear

    no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed at

    the little jokes we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me, pray for

    me.

    Let my name be ever the household word that it always was. Let it

    be spoken without effect, without the ghost of a shadow on it. Life

    means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was; there is

    absolutely unbroken continuity. What is this death but a

    negligible accident? Why should I be out of mind because I am out

    of sight? I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very

    near, just around the corner . . . All is well.”

    by Henry Scott Holland (1847-1918)

  • barbara
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 4:30 AM

    Unfortunately, bars on beds are not allowed in assisted living facility. Ifound this to be true in Tennessee and Florida, so I am assuming it must be a federal mandate. We did mange to get an assist on the side of the bed so My mother could safely get her self up to use the bathroom with her walker. Her facility in Florida did give the residents an alert pendant to wear on their neck for help and also it alerted the nursing staff if she did fall.

    I am sorry for your loss and the rough ending.

  • Kathleen Baldwin
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 4:21 AM

    To live in the hearts we leave behind, is not to die!
    May all of your beautiful memories sustain you!
    Your mom was a lucky lady to have YOU as her daughter!!!

  • Our French Oasis
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 4:12 AM

    I am so so sorry, I know exactly what you went through, I went through exactly the same with the death rattle with my Mother, I feel as if it was yesterday, I have tears rolling down my face as I write this, how I miss my Mother too. Big hugs xxx

  • Sheila from the luncheon
    · Reply

    November 15, 2017 at 12:03 AM

    A beautiful lady who was your mother. May the happy loving memories sustain you. My prayers are with you.

  • Ellie's friend from Canada
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 11:51 PM

    I am so sorry (and annoyed) to hear they left your Mother on the floor for 5 hours. I was a little surprised that the doc said she would have more time. Similarly, my mother’s doctor said she would linger for a couple of weeks but as soon as he left the nurse said it would only be two or three days at the most; she said I could not take her back to the nursing home as she would not make it in the ambulance. In retrospect I am grateful to that nurse. I still feel guilty because my mother asked me to take her home or back to the nursing home. I had fully intended to bring her home to die but it didn’t happen that way.

    I had a similar experience with my mother. I had not had a shower for 3 days nor any sleep. I went home and was showered and back in 45 minutes. The hospital had finally found a cot that I could sleep on. My brother (who had stayed with her while I went home) left. I was just about to lie down on the cot. Not more than 5 minutes after he left, the nurse came in and told me not to go to sleep as her time was near. I have never understood why they let my brother leave. Why didn’t they tell him the time was short? He was really caught off guard when I phoned him. And I felt badly for him. I could not reach him to tell him to come back in time.

    Dear Elizabeth, do not feel badly about leaving and not making it back in time. Also do not feel badly about her comment, “Why are you punishing me?”. She knows in her heart and in her right mind that you would never do so. Also, some loved ones will only depart this earth if a loved one leaves the room while others will hold on (if it is in their power to do so) until the loved one gets there. I have a friend who could not bear to go see her mother. She told me her mother was lingering and no-one could understand it. I told her “you must go see her and hold her hand. She is waiting for you”. When my friend got there, her mother looked so relieved and passed away shortly afterwards.

    The fact your lovely mother had a death rattle did not predict how soon she would pass. It could be hours or days. Your mother knows that you loved her dearly. I love the family photo of you, your Mom, your sons at Christmas last year. You can see in her face that she was well-loved and knew she was, too. I believe that she may come to you soon if only for a moment. My father and my brother did but I was always concerned because my mother did not. Now you will laugh. I feel my mother when I am in the garden which was her garden. She was always a good supervisor and I sense her approval with what I’ve done. Now to the funny part. She came to me perhaps in a dream. It was about a couple of weeks ago. And she said “You should marry X. You would have so much fun”. I can’t help but think of your mother who told you that you should marry THE Italian. When my mother came to me I laughed. In life she would never have told me such a thing but I guess she feels freer now with her advice. Be at peace, Elizabeth. You gave her a lifetime of love as she gave to you. What more can anyone ask for?

  • Audra
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 11:27 PM

    I am so sorry for your loss. You have so many fond memories of your mother, I hope they ease your pain. May your family find peace as you mourn. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

  • Daron
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 11:11 PM

    “Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep” by Mary Elizabeth Frye.

    Do not stand at my grave and weep
    I am not there. I do not sleep.
    I am a thousand winds that blow.
    I am the diamond glints on snow.
    I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
    I am the gentle autumn rain.
    When you awaken in the morning’s hush
    I am the swift uplifting rush
    Of quiet birds in circled flight.
    I am the soft stars that shine at night.
    Do not stand at my grave and cry;
    I am not there. I did not die.

  • Kathy L
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 9:22 PM

    Elizabeth I am so sorry to hear that your mom passed. I enjoyed the beautiful photos of her. In sharing your story, I learned a lot about the end of life, as both my parents are still alive. May your heart be filled with wonderful memories of joyful times together.

    To live in the hearts we leave behind, is not to die. ~Thomas Campbell

  • Jan Sher Tuckerman
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 9:11 PM

    Dearest Elizabeth, the death of one’s mama is a tough blow to the heart and mind…our moms started it all and know our childhood better than we do. I’m so anguished regarding your mom’s hospice stay. My dad, also, had a complete fiasco in one, as well. Keep in your head all the wondrous memories you have of her and cherish them forever. I? am so sorry for the loss of her in your life. Sending you white healing light. Love you more, jan

  • Sheila-Merle Johnson
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 7:58 PM

    What a beautiful and powerful testimonial to your mother’s last days. Thank you for sharing this story so richly with us. I could relate to your anger at the assisted living facility. I had similar experiences with my mother. And my husband’s last words to me were so similar to yours. Your mother had such a beautiful face. I loved her impish look under her enormous sombrero. My heart is with you in this time.

  • Celeste
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 7:09 PM

    Elizabeth, I am glad that you have been able to recap your mother’s experience with death. I am sorry you and she have had to go through the difficulties that come with the end of life. I remember spending time with your family with fond memories. Betty was always so fun to spend time with. I don’t know if you remember, but she spent a few years volunteering in my front office at OASIS. It was a lot of fun having her there and she always kept me up on you and the family, especially your boys. She was so proud of them.
    Keep the good memories. It will take you a long way!
    Sending lots of love your way.

  • Caroline
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 6:37 PM

    I feel privileged that you have shared these memories with us all. Kind and gentle thoughts are with you and your family x

  • Brenda Welch
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 5:48 PM

    Ooooh dear one…..I am SO SORRY. Thank You for sharing your photos with us. I especially love the one with all of you at Xmas.
    Sending you LOTSA Hugs & Love during these days.

  • Mithra Ballesteros
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 5:13 PM

    Elizabeth, I don’t know what to say. Your mother was so like you, you must have a hole in your heart now. I live in fear of the death of my parents and I’m so sorry about the loss of yours. Much love to you.

  • Rosemarie
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 3:57 PM

    Dear Contessa

    Thank you for sharing the pics and the sad turn of events with your mother. I love how the people who follow your blog send out messages of comfort during this difficult time. Your blog has created a wonderful community of friends. Sad that safety was not of major concern by the staff when your mother had first fallen out of bed. A very difficult time you had been going thru with staff. It’s hard when we decide to leave – planning to come back and then get the phone call. I was at the hospital in the morning visiting my mother – everyone thought she was doing well so I went home planning to come back in the afternoon. An hour later I was making my husband’s birthday cake when a really cold chill/sensation came over my body. A few minutes later the hospital called to tell me she had died. When I returned the nurses were all shocked re her death as she had been doing so well.

    I can sure see your mother in you – face and hands. I liked some of your mother’s expressions. Gave me the impression that she had a great sense of humour.

  • Lisa
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 3:02 PM

    Oh, E-Beth I am so sorry to hear about your Mom passing. I will never forget her.
    Big giant hug and much love, Lisa

  • LA CONTESSA
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 2:58 PM

    VIA EMAIL:
    Cara Elizabeth,

    My deepest sympathies to you and your family on the passing of your dear Mother. My dear Mother passed away 4 years ago, so I know it is life changing. Your Mother must be a very special person to raise such a wonderful daughter. I love the picture you sent me with all of you together last Christmas. Thank you.

    We are staying at the Castello di Fonterutoli, for a little getaway. You and Giampiero may know of their award winning world class wines. The castello/ borgo is stunning. We are booked tonight in their restaurant for dinner. Just what we needed.

    Baci baci, Robin

  • Ruth Yunker
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 2:24 PM

    Elizabeth, I’m so sorry. I went through this with both my parents. My father died two years ago. All I know is your darling and wonderful mother is at pure peace and happiness. I believe this thoroughly. Although when I said this to my own wonderful father, who knew his death was approaching, he said, “I just hope you know what you’re talking about.”
    This is a beautiful blog post, and of course, one of the most important and heartfelt you will ever write. Your mother definitely approves. She was a beautiful woman right up until her death. Now I see where you get your own marvelous beauty, inside and out.

  • Katie
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 2:12 PM

    Oh Elizabeth… I am so sorry that your beautiful Mother’s last days were so uncomfortable for her. She is in a better place and in no pain. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers

  • Stacie
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 1:49 PM

    Elizabeth, ever the faithful daughter, may you find peace after grief. These photos and words about your mother are lovely and authentic. Just like you. You must be exhausted, so please rest and take care of yourself. XOXO, Stacie

  • Ms. Mary
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 1:30 PM

    Dear, Dear Elizabeth. You gave her a gift in her last years- the love and devotion and care that we would all wish for. Having been through the death of my own Mom, I can truly say that I’m feeling your grief right now. There are no words. Just know I am sending hugs across the miles.
    She will live forever in your heart. <3

  • Never mind Donna
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 1:13 PM

    Dear Beth:

    I am so sorry for your loss. I remember your Mom, “Aunt Betty” fondly from so long ago. No matter how long we have our loved-ones in our lives, losing them is never easy.

  • Catherine Lartigue
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 1:00 PM

    Prayers and condolences to you and your family. One of the nuns who taught me in school told us that when someone you love passed away, don’t pray for them but pray to them for guidance. Your mom’s spirit lives . Pray to her!!!

  • Antonia
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 12:53 PM

    OUR DEAREST, DARLING, BELOVED CONTESSA, your mom was so fortunate to live well into ripe old age, lucky to have been taken care of by her wonderful daughter, having enjoyed her offspring, her grandchildren, seeing them grow up, having shared with you her wisdom when the waters got rough during your trials and tribulations, but also during the many happy times which will always be a cleansing source of comfort as long as you live. You”re so lucky to have had her all your life. Nobody can ever replace the loss of a mother, no matter how old. And nobody can ever prepare us how to deal with it. May her smile be your eternal guiding light which will carry you through this difficult time and beyond. My prayers are with you and your family, con tutto il mio affetto e amore. Huge hugs.

  • Taste of France
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 12:15 PM

    Wow. So much of your story is similar to what my parents went through. They passed away two years ago, within three weeks of each other. The death rattle is hard to take.
    Focus your memories on times a little farther back, a little happier and healthier. Those things will sustain you.
    Wishing you strength and courage.

  • Loree
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 12:14 PM

    P.S. thanks for sharing your mother’s last days with us. I am sure it wasn’t easy to have to re-live certain moments. Take care.

  • Loree
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 12:09 PM

    It is always to sad to see the people we know and love grow weak and fall ill. It is especially hard when they are our parents. You have gone through a lot these past months and our thoughts and prayers are with you.

  • Rae Ecklund
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 12:01 PM

    Dear Contessa,

    What a fascinating lady. And beautiful! You gave as much as any child could. Emotionally and physically.
    I love that symbolically her light will shine on at your dinner table with the help of The Italian.
    Big hugs to you and your family.

    Rae

  • Brenda Kinsel
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 11:30 AM

    Dear Elizabeth, thank you for the beautiful pictures of your mom. So happy to get part of the story about how she ushered the Italian into your life. My heart goes out to you! Love, Brenda

  • Nancy B.
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 11:22 AM

    Heartfelt condolences to you. The death of a parent is never easy, even when you’re “prepared.” Even though I don’t know you, or know you only through your blog, my sense is you were a kind and loyal daughter who would have done anything to make your mother’s last days as comfortable as possible. Sounds like she had a great, long life and family members who cared. What more can any of us ask? Be well and remember to be kind to yourself during, what may sometimes be, sad days ahead. Soon enough the pleasant memories of all you and your mother shared will outnumber the moments of sorrow. Xo.

  • Parnassus
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 11:05 AM

    Hello Contessa, Certainly you mother’s very last days were bitter, but getting to know her through this post I see that up to that time she kept all her verve and energy; properties that she so obviously passed on to you. Her warm smile in all these photos will always be my mental image of her.
    –Jim

  • Sheri Siehl
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 10:27 AM

    My heart hurts for you and your family.

  • Stella Martin
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 10:10 AM

    So very sorry. Sending you hugs and love.

  • Diana Amato
    · Reply

    November 14, 2017 at 9:42 AM

    Yes! Let there always be Light. Sending you prayers for peace and serenity. Baci Contessa.
    XOXO Diana

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