A SENSE OF HUMOR.

March 27, 2024 103 Comments

THANK GOD I HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR or by now I would be rolled up in a ball rocking back and fourth protecting myself from THE BAD NEWS that seems to be coming from ALL DIRECTIONS!

I received an email from THE NEUROLOGIST 27 days after the wires were taken off my head.

And YES the glue is now gone out of my hair!

To RE-FRESH your memory I had an EEG done February 27th thru March 1, 2024.

I was told I would have THE RESULTS in 5 to 7 days.

Well, THAT DIDNOT HAPPEN.

I will SPARE you the DETAILS but a confession and a legitimate excuse from the NEUROLOGIST; I could understand!

Got MY APPROVAL.

THE LATEST DIAGNOSIS BELOW of my BRAIN.

SO, this is the FINDINGS FROM THE LATEST TESTS THAT WERE PREFORMED IN MY HOME ON FEB.27 th through March 1, 2024.Now they did see SEIZURES back a few years ago when I went for a sleep apnea test.Which resulted in ANTI-SEIZURE MEDICATION.SO, they saw NO seizures this time maybe because I’m on medication?So, because I hit the button a few times and EVERYTHING WAS NORMAL in these 3 days of testing my meds are being TOSSED to the wind and I am to FREE FALL back to where I began?

AND I am to use an APP to CURE ME!

I kid YOU NOT!

REMEMEBER …………?

I would say I have some WEAKNESS.

I CAN STILL WALK BUT DON’T ASK ME TO RUN!

NO TREMORS.

ABNORMAL MOVEMENT if you consider getting out of a chair after a few hours of sitting YES!

LOSS OF BALANCE has been prevalent for a few years now, but I have NEVER FALLEN.

I have ALWAYS had difficulty SWALLOWING.

Pills especially.

LOOK THEY USE MY WORD OF EPISODES!

NO SHAKING EVER AND THANK GOODNESS I NEVER LOST CONSCIOUSNESS!

SO, is this really what I am experiencing?

Wait until you hear the CURE!

But first let’s take a quick stroll through the garden…………..

THE CURE IS TO DO SOME MINDFULNESS OR MEDITATE and to get THE CALM APP.

Plus, see a PSYCHOTHERAPIST who specializes in FND.

FUNCTIONAL NEUROLOGICAL DISORDER.

YEP……….this came from the NEUROLOGIST HIMSELF.

Not from my GOOGLE searches.

I actually had an appointment yesterday with a therapist who was a PSYCHOTHERAPIST.

Even she had NEVER heard of this before!

I hope most of YOU can IMAGINE how I feel at this point!

I feel I am going backwards.NOT FORWARDS.

Great to get off the anti-seizure meds, but that will take 7 weeks.

I DO have a FEW THOUGHTS!

Will the EPISODES come FAST and FURIOUS as I dwindle down the pills?

Will the sensation of PASSING OUT come back now that those tiny pills TOOK AWAY?

That meant so much to me as I did not feel as if I was dying!

I have already had 9 EPISODES in MARCH 2024.

They seem to be coming more frequently and that was BEFORE I FOUND OUT THIS NEWS!

That is WHY WE DID THIS TEST.

THE EPISODES in total by month( WENT UP LAST YEAR FROM 2022.)

SO if STRESS has anything to do with what I have been EXPERIENCING FOR THE LAST 8.5 years then it will definitely MULTIPLY under these conditions!

IT’s a WAIT AND SEE GAME NOW.

The GOOD NEWS is I can have a glass of wine again or two!

SO, I have marked the calendar MAY 14th, 2024 YOUR CONTESSA can start DRINKING AGAIN!

That might not be such a BAD IDEA!

On a lighter NOTE.I have a DEAR friend who’s granddaughter is getting married.The Granddaughter had something to talk to her about and of course she leant an ear.Because MY FRIEND had been such an important part of her Life the Granddaughter wanted to know if she would be HER FLOWER GRANNY in her wedding!Since she did not have a FLOWER GIRL.

A FLOWER GRANNY!

I had tears in my eyes when she told me this……………..

HOW GORGEOUS IS THAT AND WHAT A THOUGHTFUL GRANDDAUGHTER!

I am BESIDE MYSELF and can hardly wait for the photos as the FLOWER GIRL(oops)GRANNY is the FIRST to come down the aisle!

If you are interested you can see an old blog post NO PHOTOS however of when I started sharing my STRANGE and UNDIAGNOSED journey.Only to be diagnosed with lung scaring,focal seizures and heart failure in the years to follow!

It’s a bit MUCH for one human being.

Who was still full of LIFE and had GRAND DREAMS.

I’m NOT ANYMORE.This has worn me to the core and my BODY feels it.

TO SEE A BLOG POST FROM MARCH 13 ,2017 where I asked for YOUR HELP and YOU GAVE IT!

CLICK HERE = https://thevintagecontessa.blog/i-need-your-help/

I know a lot of you hate it when I talk about my health but I need to do it as I have a record of dates and documentation which has come in very handy.Things I otherwise would have forgotten!My plan now is to get these tests and GO OUTSIDE KAISER for another opinion if not two.It’s long overdue and its TIME.

My Best to YOU and all YOUR FEEDBACK………..

My meditation is above here!They clear my head and make me laugh constantly along with the BIG OLAF!

DO I REALLY NEED THE CALM APP?

XXX

103 Comments

Leave your reply.

chris
· Reply

April 18, 2024 at 10:28 PM

elizabeth i cant just blame it on kaiser but i did lose 2 dear lovely people because of kaiser. they do what they can to avoid paying when the chips are down especially as we age.

suspicious that this is back to the hysterical female aspect of medicine, where they blame women’s psyches & need for attention for medical issues we know in our bones are real. part of the reason is that men are physically easier study subjects so they know much less about treating women.

seizures are not a joke, nor are heart & lung issues. clearly you are not making things up. meditation and breathing exercises do not cover everything. how dare they rush to snap judgment & just dump “theoretical” stuff on you. . i hope u can find a way to look into this further, even if it means paying a neurologist out of pocket for a consult after making sure he/she can access all your relevant records.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  April 19, 2024 at 4:02 PM
  
  Got referrals!
  I am MOVING FORWARD!
  I do have a NEUROLOGIST who has been very kind and helpful at KAISER.But we need to dig DEEPER as I can not live like this anymore!
  I’m worn out!Im sure the HEART FAILURE has not helped.BUT THE ANIMALS KEEP ME CALM AND SMILING!
  Xxx
Alison
· Reply

April 8, 2024 at 3:01 PM

I’m so sorry for all your horrible, frustrating unresolved medical conditions. My experience with Kaiser has been their institutional tendency to dismiss medical conditions as inconsequential.

I had a palpable tumor strangling my facial nerve and requiring 5 hours of surgery to remove REPEATEDLY diagnosed as nothing by Kaiser physicians and finally as me needing psychotherapy. Thank goodness my dentist sent me to a Head and Neck surgeon NOT IN ANY WAY affiliated with Kaiser who immediately ordered imaging to confirm a tumor the size of my fist! My father was diagnosed with hemorrhoids when he actually had stage 4 colon cancer!! My father in law died from contamination during heart surgery with an antibiotic resistant bacteria. There are probably many instances of excellent outcomes with Kaiser. This has not been the case for me or my family.

Stanford Healthcare in Palo Alto has the resources and systemic intellectual curiosity to approach complex medical challenges in a holistic manner. I have gone there for years and used the services of many of their specialists including surgeons, the care has been exceptional. They do require a doctor’s referral to access their specialists which can be faxed to them. A faster alternative is their “Online Second Opinion” program. Here is the link https://stanfordhealthcare.org/second-opinion/overview.html

Stanford, UCSF, CLEVELAND Clinic and many other outstanding medical facilities have accessible and outstanding online second opinion programs.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  April 9, 2024 at 6:07 AM
  
  Thank You!
  What a POWERFUL COMMENT!
  Appreciate the second opinion option very much!
  I had NO IDEA!
  Stanford not accepting new FND patients I have been told.
  Nor does the neurology department pick up the phone!
  I’m ON this andI’m also working with MAYO CLINIC!
  Thank You!
  I would LOVE TO TAKE YOU TO LUNCH FOR THIS INFORMATION!
  Xxx
- Alison
  · Reply
  
  April 9, 2024 at 2:58 PM
  
  You a very welcome, Contessa. I have read your column for years and shared your frustration with finding answers to your complex and life altering symptoms. Asking for a second opinion on just the latest FND finding/diagnosis may be presenting a limited view of the scope of your medical conditions. There maybe considerable value in asking for a complete evaluation of your symptoms and history and requesting a path forward.
  
  When accessing/requesting an appointment with Stanford physicians, including specialists and surgeons, a physician referral form faxed to the department is needed. They do not make exceptions to this procedure probably due to the domestic as well as global demand for their services.
  
  Here are the links:
  
  The first link is to the actual Neuroscience form to FAX by the referring physician.
  
  The second, importantly, is an overview of the process including the online referral process through Epic or Medlink.
  
  https://stanfordhealthcare.org/content/dam/SHC/referralcomponent/neuroscience-referral-form.pdf
  
  https://stanfordhealthcare.org/health-care-professionals/physician-resource-center/referral-information.html
  
  The second opinion online process, as far as I can tell does not require a physician’s referral.
- chris
  · Reply
  
  April 18, 2024 at 10:54 PM
  
  alison, my god i’m sorry this happened to you. thank goodness for your dentist. kaiser denied a friend’s surgery as experimental when it was standard treatment. clearly their goal was for her to die before the appeal process was final, which is what happened.
Kathryn P
· Reply

April 6, 2024 at 9:14 AM

Hello Contessa. Lots of good advice here. Very frustrating and stressfull to find a diagnosis. I have had a similar battle for my son. It’s like a maze. Dealing with the medical system is stressfull – knowing who to attempt to get an appointment with in the first place for answers. From pillar to post. And then the appointment itself. We had an hour and forty five minute wait past our appointment time once. The Specialist had no interpersonal skills and I found myself imagining a sticky end to her to cheer myself up after the ordeal – got our hopes up, only to be treated with total contempt. Normally I am a peacefull person. It just seems never ending stress. Recently said son was diagnosed with a small heart murmur along with everything else. Now I have to do meditation and calm apps to try to get my blood pressure down – its shot up and is staying up. If this continues, I’m going to have to go on blood pressure medication. I can’t get the medical glue out of my hair from my concussion axident. Well done to you for getting all that out of your hair. I am sorry you are having such a difficult time with your health. It’s all very well being told to breathe and spend time outside in the garden, but when it feels things are pilling up and everything is going to custard, with no answers on how to make things better, I am without words. Strangely, I found a serious butt-kicking, avenging movie very satisfying and therapeutic to watch this evening – not usually my cup of tea. Never mind smelling flowers. Although, I did also (unusually) buy myself a simple bunch of flowers today and they look lovely on the dinning table. Such a mix of feelings.
- La Contessa
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  April 7, 2024 at 2:16 PM
  
  Kathryn,
  First off a BIG HUG TO YOU AND YOUR SON!I have had a heart murmur since birth!So there is that good news and I will be 64 in July.I can totally relate to all that you have explained here!When it comes to our children we become even MORE STRESSED.I went from very low BP to on the high side before they found out I was in heart failure.The drugs work and I do feel a difference!
  I am working and taking notes as if I were in a 9 to 5 job!
  I’m exhausted and very flat now with very little hope.Next week I have TWO THERAPIST APPOINTMENTS TO FIND OUT WHAT I HAVE.Lets hope I do not lose it with them!!!Xxx
  - Kathryn P
    · Reply
    
    April 7, 2024 at 4:22 PM
    
    Thank you for your hug! Exhaustion makes everything hard work. And when you are fighting a flawed health system – tiring upon tiring. There is a certain amount of grieving involved when health deteriorates – which can also pile on more exhaustion. Anger and frustration can be part of grieving too. It is disappointing to have negative experiences with Specialists – they are in a helping and healing role. And where do you go if they are not able to provide answers? You keep trying to find answers and move forward – but at a walking pace, rather than a run – the tortoise, not the hare. And you don’t take their poor bedside manner personally. Keep walking forward – the answers are there somewhere. I hope your persistance pays off. I should listen to myself!
    All the very best for some helpfull outcomes from your appointments.
1010ParkPlace
· Reply

April 2, 2024 at 3:39 PM

Yes!!! Go outside of your area and get more opinions. Finally! I’ve hoped you would do this for years! Don’t wait! Someplace like the Mayo Clinic or perhaps Stanford would have some referrals. I can’t imagine dealing with all of this and living in fear for as long as you have. XOXOX, Brenda
- La Contessa
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  April 7, 2024 at 2:19 PM
  
  Stanford not taking NEW PATIENTS with FND!
  They don’t even pick up the PHONE!
  Mayo is waiting on my Nuerologist now to send referral!
  I have done a lot of legwork on my own this past week from my phone!Out of 18 therapists I have and appointment with three of them!
  Any questions you can think that I should ask?
  Xoxo
Mary
· Reply

April 1, 2024 at 3:21 PM

I went to the internet and found some interesting info on NIH site, and apparently there are other hospitals participating in work on this. . Stanford probably the best and closest for you. NIH might even have a site to e-mail them for the information. Not sure. Seeing your lovely face smiling, and always looking like a fabulous Contessa with your darling granddaughter, the animals, the gorgeous garden I am sure helps and brings joy. I know nothing about this condition, but wonder if some light ballet exercises, and or Tai Chi and meditation would help. I know I want to do Tai Chi again as I am always falling, and it helps with that issue. Thinking of you, and sent you photo of your God dog after stealing my rabbit ears. He will be 14 on the 12th. Told him he will finally be older than me.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  April 2, 2024 at 7:50 AM
  
  Stanford not accepting NEW PATIENTS.
  And NOT ANSWERING THE PHONE!
  I’m on it!!!
  Xxx
  - Abgail
    · Reply
    
    April 8, 2024 at 4:35 PM
    
    I have had good results by following the doctor referral procedure at Stanford. You must be referred by a physician, unfortunately they do not allow the patient to refer themselves.
    
    https://stanfordhealthcare.org/content/dam/SHC/referralcomponent/neuroscience-referral-form.pdf
    
    https://stanfordhealthcare.org/health-care-professionals/physician-resource-center/referral-information.html
  - Abgail
    · Reply
    
    April 8, 2024 at 4:36 PM
    
    I have had good results by following the doctor referral procedure at Stanford. You must be referred by a physician, unfortunately they do not allow the patient to refer themselves.
    
    These are the correct links. Good luck, you deserve it!
    
    https://stanfordhealthcare.org/content/dam/SHC/referralcomponent/neuroscience-referral-form.pdf
    
    https://stanfordhealthcare.org/health-care-professionals/physician-resource-center/referral-information.html
Marcia
· Reply

March 31, 2024 at 12:33 PM

Dear Elizabeth,
Have you tried getting in as a new patient at UCSF? I did see a wonderful neurologist there, but I can’t remember his name, and it has been over a decade now. Just trying to think of an option for you. Sending positive light and love!
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  April 2, 2024 at 7:54 AM
  
  No because I hate the drive and location!Bad reason I know however after taking my 89 year old mother there and they made us wait for two hours maybe more we ended up leaving without being seen.It left a REALLY BAD TASTE IN MY MOUTH!
  I’ll call today just to see how far I get!This will be a test of my patience!Stanford not taking new patients not answering the phone either!
  I’m on it!!
  Xxx
Parnassus
· Reply

March 31, 2024 at 3:19 AM

Hello Contessa, Specialists can each fix one thing, but a syndrome, such as you apparently have, crosses many specialties but it seems there is no one who can span them all to address a case such as yours. You just have to keep fighting and adding small pieces to the puzzle.
.
I loved your sunny outdoor pictures on this stormy day here. Next week I am returning to Ohio for several months, so I should escape some of the broiling Taiwan weather that is just around the corner. I hope that this summer will see your health improve.
–Jim
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  April 2, 2024 at 7:57 AM
  
  Thanks JIM!
  Have a safe flight home!
  I’m certain it will be good to see family and friends!
  How many years have you been in Taiwan?
  XXX
Karen Persson
· Reply

March 31, 2024 at 2:24 AM

Hi honey,

It’s great that you post about your health so we can understand (or try to) what you’re going through, plus we can try to give some suggestions. Unbelievable that after the testing they now said to use the Calm app and use psychotherapy? Mediations apps definitely help (I use 10% Happier for meditation which I use each morning and have been using for more than 6 years now). I hope the doctors figure out really good solutions for you.

Much love to you!

Karenxoxo
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  April 2, 2024 at 8:05 AM
  
  At this point I have LOST ALL HOPE IN DOCTORS.I want to see one that knows about this so called FND and give me the song and dance!Then I shall deal with it myself as it’s supposedly ALL IN MY HEAD!
  I have contacted 3 doctors and a nurse and only one doctor knew about it and one of those doctors was a neurosurgeon back in the day and he’s never heard of it!Of course he is RETIRED NOW. One of my past doctors who I went to. I contacted her as she’s already worked on the retraining of the brain with me which did not work and she says it’s a bit like IBS from what she read she had never heard of it. That’s a general term when they don’t know what’s going on.
  Not much to be HOPEFUL.
  Starting week two of medicine reduction.So far doing well just a bit more Crabby but that could be THE FRUSTRATION IM FACING!
  XXX
  - Karen Persson
    · Reply
    
    April 15, 2024 at 2:27 AM
    
    Sounds so frustrating and exhausting with all the uncertainty of how to deal with it.
    
    Sending healing love to you!
    
    Karenxox
D. A. Squires
· Reply

March 30, 2024 at 9:17 AM

I had not yet read this post when I sent the bunny photo… I am so concerned about you and so angry. Yours is a saga that should be published. It is a scathing indictment of the medical profession and sadly, predictive–there will be no change. There is more need than there are medical doctors and this disparity will only continue to grow. And the veil of technology allows them to completely ESCAPE patient contact. Who would even choose to go into medicine today- for a thousand reasons. The guidance to use a CALM APP is unbelievable. At first I thought this has to be a joke, but no, it was the MD’s advice?&^%$! The whole thing is a giant tangled web you have been dealing with–heroically, often stoically, with humor and positivity–for YEARS. You are amazing and you deserve the Gold Medal for Perseverance-Keeping One’s Sanity. I know you will forge ahead, as you always have, and get the additional opinions… pray the ‘right door’ will open soon and you will finally have correct diagnosis and treatment that works. You have a wonderful husband and the sweetest pets by your side, and beautiful garden vistas… the best Rx of ALL. XOXO
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  April 2, 2024 at 8:12 AM
  
  I signed up for seven days of the Calm app for FREE! otherwise it’s $70 a month or so I read just what I need one more app but maybe I do need this let me just say I’m on day five of seven and my notes are I have no thoughts when I’m taking my breath. The only thing I noticed is my breaths are too shallow. My breathing is very short, which I knew already that’s from the lung disease non-tuberculosis bacterium, I have no thoughts pulling me away, so I believe I’m already in a meditative state in my daily routine. My mind does not wander off as they keep repeating.you can bring it back with the breath.I don’t think about a goddamn thing. and with that sentence you know I’m at my wits end I am fed up I am flat. I have no more hope.
  I have a phone call set up tomorrow morning and I hope that’ll take me to a door that can answer my questions we shall see. I shall keep you updated. Big hugs coming from California all the way across United States to you!!!
  Xoxo
Diana Amato
· Reply

March 29, 2024 at 9:34 AM

Well it seems that you are certainly being put through the bureaucratic hoops associated with our health care system. After all this time to do a complete upheaval of all prior diagnoses seems pretty lame! Is that even a fair and thorough assessment coming from these doctors? I think not.
I’m glad we got to spend a few minutes chatting yesterday. If it will help, I’m still waiting for authorization for one of my mom’s prescriptions. It has been well over 5 weeks now. Discouraged doesn’t even start to define how it makes her feel!
Thank goodness for our animals. They lighten up our lives like nothing else can.
Much love to you always,
Diana, La Zingara XOX
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  April 2, 2024 at 8:15 AM
  
  Just ONE DIAGNOSIS and ONE DOCTOR.
  Well five weeks is WAY TOO LONG!
  March into that OFFICE!
  Xoxo
Katherine
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 6:10 PM

Hi Elizabeth,
You have been through the wringer, and look at YOU, your sense of humor has not left you. I think when our mind, body, and spirit is faced with so much over a number of years it’s not easy to keep it all together. I admire that YOU keep your wits
about you. It helps having loving fur children by your side. Also not to leave out “The Italian.” I know he’s a huge part of your support system.
I’m sure you will be very wise on indulging in small sips of wine testing the waters first to make sure you can handle the alcohol.
On an upbeat and happy note I sure enjoyed seeing your beautiful garden. Gardens have a way of bringing a special type of peace, relaxation, and Joy.
How are you enjoying Barbara
Streisand’s 900 page book so far?
I’m a fan, but since I have bad RA in my hands and wrists I’m not sure I can handle such a heavy book. How are you handling that heavy of a book?
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 6:24 PM
  
  I LOVED IT AND PASSED IT ON TO ANOTHER 80 year old FRIEND WHO CANNOT PUT IT DOWN!
  JUST PUT A PILLOW ON YOUR LAP THEN THE BOOK ON TOP!
  OR PROP UP ON THE ARM OF A CHAIR.
  You can balance it on the arm.
  Also you can download to a kindle I think.I donot have one of those so know little about it. Maybe someone can chime in who does………
  I’m ALL WRINGERED OUT!
  One day soon I shall wake up with ALL WHITE HAIR!
  Tried calling Stanford today and yesterday No one picks up………….they send you to their website!f you are a NEW PATIENT!
  NICE WELCOME…………..ha!
  XXX
Pipistrello
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 6:04 PM

Bella, yes this is a all a bit much for one human being. I don’t know how you keep that sense of humour rolling along. You are made of sterner stuff than your crazy medical diagnoses should suggest!

On a lighter note, are you sure that plump piggy of yours has lost some weight??

Enjoy the glass of vino (and take care scaling back that medication)!

Baci xx
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 6:28 PM
  
  YES, I am sure if you go back to SEPT/ OCT and see photos of him when we brought him home he was much more HEFTY!
  I started feeding him more today as he seems to be HUNGRY!
  That celery and those carrots are not agreeing with his TASTE BUDS so I made him a potato dish!
  SUPER DELICIOUS TREAT………….YES! I COOK FOR THE PIG!
  XXX
GRACIELA
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 2:55 PM

I do love reading all, I also want you to know by writing about it, you may be helping others.

I love your style, I love your home and I am a believer that YOU, only YOU can be your own advocate. Hooray, everyone has a right for a second opinion and make sure you get the best as good ol Kaiser is paying for it!

As for flower girl Granny, what a honor! Beautiful, Beautiful.

What is great and joyous to read is that YOU do have a great sense of humor and that is what is giving you strength. Wishing you always the best during this Holy Week and Easter. Take care and God Bless you and your family.

Graciela
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 5:27 PM
  
  I’m mystified to know what is around the next corner !When I think it can’t get any worse and it CAN WITH cancer I just keep LAUGHING at how Bizarre the responds are if there is a response and how it compared to my younger days!
  We MUST LAUGH because I can’t make this stuff UP!
  I would NEVER imagined my golden years would be spent like this.
  NEVER!!
  Xxx
Katherine Cramer
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 2:52 PM

Dear Contessa,
I join the ‘agree with Sandra’ group that suggests Stanford (and others as needed). My spouse had red splotches on his skin that went for years with no diagnosis from dermatologists. One day, a doctor who had spent time at Stanford for training, thought she knew what rare diagnosis was happening and named a Stanford doctor who was working on skin leukemia. My spouse’s experience with Stanford was good. Being that we live in Oakland and treatments in Oakland are most convenient–we switched back to Kaiser coverage now that we know his diagnosis. As for Meditation–I am a fan. There are so many versions and like finding a therapist you like…try a few until you find some good matches. Mindfulness and Psychotherapy seem to go hand-in-hand these days, especially in our part of the country. I believe that including new facets to your care is helpful. Empathy for what you have endured and continue to experience–is high. Elizabeth, you do so much positive Self Care already. It may be time for more discovery that hopefully yields effective results. Keep writing and sharing.
Hugs from Oakland,
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 5:37 PM
  
  Katherine,
  Happy you are a fan of STANFORD.I cannot get in touch with a Human there no one picks up the phone!Im RE-routed to their WEBSITE!!!
  I’ll keep working on it!
  Maybe I’ll have better luck if I go in person and knock!
  This would make a hell of a theater production!
  Once I’m DEAD can someone write a book about what I tried to do?!!!
  It’s all in chronological order in the blog!
  Remember the time I went to emergency and the young doctor said “What are you doing here?” And I said the women on the phone told me to get to the ER!She then looked in the computer and said,” You may have had a mild heart attack!”You have a Left Bundle Branch over your Heart!
  Xxx
  - Katherine Cramer
    · Reply
    
    March 29, 2024 at 10:29 AM
    
    Dear Contessa,
    I wish I had the magical key to get past the gate at Stanford. My spouse had medical coverage that was affiliated with Stanford. He was referred there and was part of a study for his rare blood leukemia that manifests in the skin. Won’t kill you… but best to be treated. Weekly light box treatments (standing nude in a UV light box for several minutes!) One would think that one of the many Specialists you’ve seen over the years– could refer you to Stanford. It helps if you can find a doctor who is studying your latest diagnosis. Enlist help from anyone reading medical journals to zero-in-on a doctor who is publishing on FND or related. I have a retired (we all are at age 67-68) pal from undergrad (Santa Clara University) who is a MD grad of Georgetown. She is a retired Psychiatrist, her spouse is retired Oncologist MD and their two sons are both doctors. I can ask Mary to look. I hope she still keeps paying for her links to medical journal sites. Mary knows a lot about Mayo Clinic as she had lived nearby for many years and worked in allied programs. She may not be a huge fan of Mayo…yet has a realistic view of what they are about. How to navigate, perhaps. My comments are not new info. You understand this, of course. Mary gave me a tour of Mayo (years ago) and I was impressed. I have first person observations about Stanford Medical–from valet parking, string quartets playing in the lobby and the lady handing out fresh-baked cookies from a basket. $$$ and Research is the reason most all of them (from top-to-bottom) are there. I was amazed how often they wanted extra blood samples from Rob…for research. Does this observation and friend link offer, help you?
    We should be off line with this conversation. I am linked to you by Andrea Serrahn.
Lorna
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 12:32 PM

Oh Elizabeth, I don’t know what to say. It’s like they come up with something new every time. I hope you get a second opinion. It sounds like you need it. I’ve never heard of an App as a cure. Maybe I’m behind the times.

Please remain your positive self. Take care and happy Easter.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 4:00 PM
  
  And me knowing what you do for a LIVING your comment cracks me UP?
  Somehow APPS AND WHAT YOU DEAL WITH DONT GO Hand IN HAND??
  You can be sure I’ll let you know the OUTCOME!
  Did my first CALM APP CLASS TODAY!
  Xxx
Sharon
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 12:22 PM

Elizabeth, I highly recommend the Stanford University Medical Center/Hospital — my (now late-) husband received amazing care there in the ’90s (actually referred there by his Kaiser/San Rafael Cardiologist). His issues were different from yours, but the attention to detail and treatments he received was unsurpassed. I spent a lot of time there interacting with his doctors/nurses and was very impressed. Good luck in getting more opinions, always a wise choice.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 3:02 PM
  
  Can’t even get through to a Real PERSON! Watched a video yesterday on two therapist psychologist who specialize in what I have on a YouTube and called the number and I have to go to the website first and then of course I have to have the referral from Kaiser which I don’t have yet, but my God they don’t make it easy!
  I’ll try Website but don’t HOLD your breath!!I have ZERO PATIENCE FOR THIS STUFF!!
  First I need the Referral.
  I’m sorry about your husband!I went to Marin Academy in the 1970’s in San Rafael!!Just found out SR has a cemetery on MONDAY!!I will be shopping for MY SPOT THERE!
  Full Circle!
  Xxx
lisa thomson author
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 12:07 PM

Hi LA CONTESSA, I’m so sorry to hear this new diagnosis. Although I suppose it is good to ‘know’ what is causing your symptoms? Can you refill your meds? It’s great that you keep track and write about it here for example. It’s very easy to dismiss symptoms or to forget from week to week how we are feeling physically. I keep a small health journal to keep track of regular test dates and results. It helps me a great deal because I forget when I was last tested for certain things.
Bless you for your sense of humour and making us all smile in spite of your health challenges. Sending love your way.
As for the App, why not try it. It can’t hurt. Although you certainly have the pet therapy available on the daily. xx
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 6:51 PM
  
  NO to refill as he is taking me off of them………..it will take 7 weeks.
  WE DO NOT KNOW WHAT IS CAUSING THE SYMPTOMS!That is why I am so UPSET as if you read through the lines of the email from the NEUROLOGIST and read up on FNB it is basically what was called HYSTERIA back in the day as mostly women had it!Even the SALEM WITCHES had FNB!I am getting more and more knowledgable as the days go by…………….AND IF THEY THINK THIS IS ME GETTING HYSTERICAL I HAVE NEWS FOR THEM!THEY HAVEN’T SEEN ANYTHING YET!Never mind this doctor has never seen me in person.How about that he has prescribed drugs for me for the last 3 or 4 years and not once seen me.WE have met in a video chat about two months ago.
  I started the CALM APP today……………I gave myself an A PLUS!Lets see what tomorrow will bring.I think of an APP as a necessity to CALM ONE SELF if you live in a city or high rise, no garden, animals etc…….and a STRESSFUL JOB it might come in SUPER HANDY.BUT WHEN YOU LIVE LIKE I DO it seems like the Emperor New Clothes all over again!WHY ON EARTH DO WITH NEED THE PHONE OR IPAD in our hand on the table talking to us with music when we have a stereo system with OUTSIDE SPEAKERS that are state of the art that can BLAST PAVAROTTI or ANDREA or JOSH GROSBAN.I have the garden. I have the music.I have nature in my backyard.WHY ON EARTH do I have to listen to water flowing when I have a creek in my backyard?AND who better to RELAX me then the ANIMAL KINGDOM WHO RULES THE PALACE HERE!
  I’m a little PISSED TODAY…………..and now its dinner time!
  OFF I fly to feed the ITALIAN!
  I have so much to share with him today!!
  XXXX
  - lisa thomson-author
    · Reply
    
    March 29, 2024 at 11:22 AM
    
    Points ALL well taken LA CONTESSA. You’re certainly entitled to be PISSED.
Heidi
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 11:41 AM

Hi Elizabeth,
Well you’ve been through the wringer. Definitely time for a second and even third opinion. Go to the best you can afford. Do what feels most right to you, follow your instinct. And, keep doing the things that bring you the most joy, in your garden, with your animals and family, among your books, in your kitchen. Enjoy and try to have some fun every day.
I’m sorry you’re struggling with this and have been for so long.
Xoxo Heidi
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 29, 2024 at 6:05 AM
  
  Thank You Heidi!
  Today I March down to Kaiser to get the test results and hopefully the referral in action!
  Woman on a MISSION!
  Xxx
Luci Short
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 11:03 AM

Hi Contessa,
I have never commented before. I really love your blog and all your musings. Maybe I have wondered how do you do it all?
Regardless, I was born with a hidden spinal defect. When I was much younger, I did not feel particularly well treated by a neurologist and perhaps, the medical community generally.
I have a medical background and thought I know how you’re behaving, and I don’t like it. You feel like you want the difficult diagnosis because it confirms your suffering. Believe me in the years to come you will be happy that you are not having to manage a chronic severe illness.
All that is really being said is that functionally your body has had to adapt to whatever life and stressors you place on it.
You are so creative that you view therapy as a waste. Let me tell you it can be life altering. Yes, you can search for further medical problems and perhaps, you will find someone who will tell you how bad it really is.
I know how bad my spine is but it likely will not shorten my life exceedingly. Add a serious neurological problem on to your normal aging and various other medical issues and you have trouble. I believe in you even though we have never met.
My Very Best,
Luci
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 29, 2024 at 6:23 AM
  
  So you don’t like how I’m BEHAVING!!!!?
  I have THREE CHRONIC MEDICAL SCENARIOS GOING ON IN MY BODY!
  1. Lungs-non-bacterium tuberculosis .
  2. Focal Seizure a form of Epilepsy or so they thought up until 3 days ago for the last 4 years.
  3. Heart Failure at age 62 and a half.
  How DARE YOU TELL ME “You DO NOT and now I’m yelling those Caps do NOT express
  J O Y !Like my behavior!!!
  I can say and ACT AS I DELIGHT as this is MY SPACE to share with my READERS SOME WHO HAVE BEEN HERE SINCE THE BEGINNING 15 years ago!
  Please correct me if I mis-understood you but for me you have OVERSTEPPED especially since you have NEVER MET ME!
  No Hugs and kisses for your bad choice of words!
  Life is NOT easy and sometimes WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THINGS.By sharing my stories and my life maybe I can HELP someone else.
  Good DAY.
  - rena.spain
    · Reply
    
    April 6, 2024 at 9:42 AM
    
    Ref. Lucie Short…..Some people say their opinion or maybe even the truth that you don’t like to hear or you think about it anyway. But the majority flatter you. There is no sympathy because only a few people know you and none of your followers can help you because they are not trained to diagnose your illness or even give healing advice and I know that with these words I have lost the last spark of sympathy I had with you.
- The 65-year-old
  · Reply
  
  March 29, 2024 at 7:56 AM
  
  I have read your comment several times to see if perhaps I got the wrong impression. You may or may not even read this, but I am posting it anyway. My interpretation of your message is that our Contessa is somehow being overly dramatic, or that she is “hoping for the worst,” or needs someone to confirm her fears. Let me assure you, that is not the case. I know this woman, and that characterization is far from accurate. Maybe you believe that by referencing your own ailment and the exemplary way in which you are handling it is helpful to the Contessa, but, alas, it is not. She does a better job of soldiering forth than anyone I know on this planet. She clearly explains why she is sharing this information, and trust me, it is not to complain. You say that she deems therapy a waste. Not sure where you got that: she wants a medical treatment, not psychological treatment. Yes the latter could certainly support the former, but it is not going to replace it. Please go back and carefully read her post. And perhaps consider being kind if you choose to comment again.
Lynda Stansberry
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 10:26 AM

I am sorry you are having to go through these health issues. I will be praying for you.
Having had issues with health in the past, I can say that facing these things does make you stronger. You seem to have a lot of hope and that is important. Your attitude will serve you well through this journey.

Lyda
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 29, 2024 at 6:25 AM
  
  Hope is FLAT OUT GONE!
  I’m in SURVIVAL MODE NOW!
  But how long can a person tread water?
  Thank You!!!!
  Xxx
Judith
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 9:50 AM

Well, this is just plain exasperating. I was really hoping for an actual diagnosis. This sounds like a catchall explanation for something they don’t understand, like irritable bowel syndrome, which is a place they dump mysterious GI symptoms. That is unacceptable. I will join the chorus in advocating for another opinion, this time from a place that will give you better service. I really wish you lived closer to me, not only because it would be fun, but because we have the incredible Vanderbilt Medical Center, a teaching hospital extraordinaire in Nashville. As you know, I have been dealing with them for several years. I did have a few minor complaints when I had to spend the night, but barring that, each and every single interaction I have had with them has exceeded my expectations. If I send a question to the portal, a nurse answers it within about 20 minutes. This has made a world of difference in my recovery. It is my sincere and continuing hope that you will soon be able to emerge from Hell and rejoin the land of the fully living. I am sending you all the healing, loving, compassionate, spiritual, and caring energy in my possession. And I will drink a glass of wine in your honor on your “wine day” in May.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 29, 2024 at 6:46 AM
  
  Well I had a diagnosis already!
  The fact they saw “Basically nothing to worry about” on this tape of three days and three nights while a camera was on me 24/7 doesNot say I might have fewer SEIZURES since I’m on meds at the time of testing.Nor does it explain why I still am having EPISODES MONTHLY!So far NINE THIS MONTH of March!
  Mostly sitting or unloading a dishwasher!Very stressful!
  There is something in my neck from my SUPER SLEUTHING that triggers them!
  Remember it’s hard for me to bend down or pull clothes out of the dryer and for sure there is no pushing a grocery cart down an aisle at a speed which would be considered a gallop swinging my head side to side no way in hell can I do that!
  As we both know the amount of SELF CARE I spend on myself is BEYOND AVERAGE.
  GLAD TO HEAR YOU ARE DOING WELL!
  XXX
CYNDY
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 9:06 AM

The Calm app is very helpful. Try it.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 10:53 AM
  
  Well I TRIED IT!
  The CALM APP.
  I signed up for the 7 day FREE TRIAL.
  Not impressed yet.
  I’m different from most people I donot think about “Things” all the time.That would exhaust me.My body can’t take it.
  Also the breath in and out for one count two count is hard for me.I have to over think that,
  Remember I have a LUNG DISEASE TOO!
  My mind NEVER WANDERED!
  I think I got an A plus for Day One!I will keep you posted!
  Thank You!
  Xxx
Dee Black
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 8:52 AM

So sorry,I understand weary. It’s the stand in the field and scream moment. Does anyone hear me?
Yes go outside your regular hospital. Go to another Neurologist and possibly Cardiologist and see if they will communicate and read all the tests already done; then, if needed new tests.
No you do not need calm APP. Your ENTIRE environment is your calm APP.
Yes, a bit scary that you had seizures and they are removing meds when you told them you are currently experiencing some of the prior symptoms before the meds.
Also, has your cardiologist mentioned vertigo. Often seen in heart patients. Some symptoms seem the same. Just a thought.
Best defense in your journey and everyone’s is to always listen to our own voice. I have found over and over, we are our best advocate for saving ourselves or our children when they were not able to tell us. Have that wine, enjoy that garden and granddaughter then begin again. ( 100 )points for keeping your journal.
Sharing your journey helps not only you but everyone.
I respect the Princess of Wales and The Kings privacy, but wonder, how many they could help with sharing more. No judgment, just saying sharing is a gift given to some that need it. A win/win when it helps you and others. Life is both, JOY and ….the other stuff……..ugh.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 4:08 PM
  
  Have already gone outside Kaiser many years ago but will do AGAIN!You touched on so much I willNOT be able to recall but YES I DO LIVE IN MY CALM ENVIRONMENT!The animals RELAX ME even if I have a Textile Trojan who loves to rip BEAUTIFUL FABRIC!!!!!
  Can’t take it with me and who do I ENJOY MORE on a daily basis?!!!I need to get referral before I can make any LEAPS FORWARD!
  Hugs to You
  XXX
Leslie Lord
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 8:34 AM

Oh Elizabeth I cannot believe that you are still going through a maze with your health issues and diagnosis!!! I have to agree with Sandra…a teaching hospital is definitely a must. Think of all those brilliant young minds and wise old doctors who love to learn about rare and unusual diseases…you could be their exceptional learning experience.
A Medical Calendar Gal !!! And a flower Granny
I wish you well and keep on the journey with your positive attitude.
Have a glass of wine in May…
Cheers

Leslie
Hostess of the Humble Bungalow
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 29, 2024 at 6:52 AM
  
  It’s really all UNBELIEVABLE!!
  Seven years of nothing is wrong with you then BOOM BOOM BOOM THREE YEARS IN A ROW THEY FIND OUT lungs,brain and heart all not functioning up to speed.
  The sad thing is no one really cares they are on to THE NEXT PATIENT!
  XXX
derba phillips
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 8:23 AM

What a long long road you have been on! Answers, finally, are hopefully will help.
Wishes for health and peace dear friend.

On another topic I send out a visual newsletter once a month with a specific color in mind. April 1 I will be sending out yellow. May I include your garden with the pots and umbrella?
xoxo
debra
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 4:13 PM
  
  Of COURSE!
  How many years ago did I get on that plane to come meet you vomiting?!!I haven’t made much progress have I?Think it’s been six or seven years!
  Heart Failure now too!
  Gosh I can remember sitting in one of those gardens having an EPISODE hoping no one would notice!
  Think that was my last trip to EUROPE!
  Xoxo
LA CONTESSA
· Reply

Author

March 28, 2024 at 7:50 AM

VIA EMAIL……….

Dearest Elizabeth,

No need to respond to this email. I just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you, and your indomitable spirit. Someone who creates so much beauty in the world is a treasure. You are a treasure.

I am so sorry this medical quest is wearing you down. As you pointed out, anybody else would be curled up in a ball right now. I am so glad you wrote about it on your blog. I hope it was cathartic. I am with Sandra Sallin. Time to get a second, third, or a chorus of new opinions. One of them will sing to you and you will get better.

Here’s a David Austin rose named after you:
Vikki
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 7:27 AM

Elizabeth, So happy you finally got some answers! I love Calm. I use it when Im in my morning bath. Somehow sets the world right …for a few hours anyway. My daughter is now settled in Long Beach. Text me some dates you are available for lunch to hear the details!!
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 4:15 PM
  
  I will but not this week!
  I’m in a FUNK!
  You call me if you donot hear from me !!!
  Xxx
Marci
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 7:11 AM

If it is any consolation at all, and I understand why it might not be, meeting you face-to-face I would never think you were I’ll, or had any fundamental health problems, for that matter. This whole journey you are on is unenviable and, because I am a professional worrier, I’m quite worried about you. Going off meds, especially after these meds seemed to have helped, does seem counterintuitive. But you are talking to a neurologist, who apparently was able to review A LOT of data coming from the test where you were all plugged in. I’m going to take the optimistic approach, following your example here, and because it is spring, the season of renewal, I believe that you will start feeling better! As for the stress, I know what it’s like to stress about stressing. We simply can’t help it. But I am going to look forward to having a glass, or two, of wine with you in May! Or at a later date because I’m sure that your dance card is going to fill up. Here for you along with so many others. All the best, Elizabeth. I’m keeping you in my thoughts. Fondly, Marci.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 8:20 AM
  
  AND MARCI the way I LOOK has worked AGAINST ME.Because I do not look like DEATH WARMED OVER I have been nudged aside and NOT LISTEN TOO all these years!I had a friend tell me to DRESS WAY DOWN when you go to the doctor NO MAKE UP!MAKE YOURSELF LOOK SICK!
  That is hard for me to do but I did try that a few times……and look where I am TODAY!
  THANK YOU!
  CIN ~ CIN as the ITALIANS would say!
  XXX
Claire
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 7:08 AM

Hi Contessa, so sorry to hear about your additional medical concerns. . And the solution. Oh my! I was just accepted by a concierge doc who came highly recommended by a few friends. It took almost a year and my constant calling for updates, but very well worth it. Just had over a 2 hour in person very thorough appointment and returned (after fasting) the next day for bloodwork, taken in his office! Got results and recommendations in 48 hours. We reviewed all aspects and current specialists for my care. Took the burden off me to develop a plan to move forward. So happy. Very expensive but what are we saving our money for? Just this! Hope you find some relief, solution, and satisfaction. Wine may be the answer in the meantime. Good luck! Best, Claire
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 8:16 AM
  
  YES, that could be an OPTION TOO!
  THANK YOU!
  XXX
Tara
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 6:44 AM

Perfect diagnosis to be given with soundtrack,

Que Sera Sera
Whatever will be will be
The future’s not ours to see
Que Sera Sera
What will be will be …..

Big HUG !

Thankful you share this journey.

Hope incoming intel arrives due to your sharing, to heal you.

Weird Twilight Zone episode, this is. Doctor sicker than patient and ego centric in confidence of ‘cure’.

Old maps said…………..Beyond This Point There Be Dragons.
New maps say…………..You Are Here !
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 8:14 AM
  
  I LOVED THAT SONG AS A CHILD!
  I have thought about going off ALL PILLS and just let nature take its course………….but I follow up on this DIAGNOSIS and see where that leads me.Then I will re-visit the plan above.
  I have said it BEFORE and will say it AGAIN.
  IT IS TOO MUCH FOR ONE PERSON!
  XOXO
Linda Clark
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 6:10 AM

I have no words of wisdom on this- only good thoughts, guiding and healing prayers.
XXOO
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 6:22 AM
  
  Linda!
  Thanks for chiming in appreciate it!
  Xxx
Libby
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 4:58 AM

Goodness, you have had more than your share of health issues. Not knowing how to “fix it” is the worse part. There are several Mayos around the country now. Pricey if you don’t have a referral.

I’m very thankful that the condo “allows” me to garden. Unlike many condos, our grounds are lovely and extensive compared to most. I maintain several garden areas. Good therapy for sure. I’ve planted three roses in one garden and the Peace rose is blooming.
On another note, I’ve been using banana peel water on some blooming plants. They seem to like it.

Do something special for yourself everyday!
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 6:21 AM
  
  Libby, next time you plant a rose you should put a banana peel in the ground before you put the rose ball in that’s one of the big Rose secrets interesting about the banana water same idea I guess the potassium!
  PEACE was one of the first roses I planted in my backyard.!
  You are missing nothing here in the old hometown!! sounds like you’re thriving in Florida! I spoke to our girlfriend the other day!xxx
Christy Ohlmann
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 4:47 AM

I would highly recommend Mayo in Rochester, Mn. I was diagnosed with 6 spots on my lungs and a blood disease all at once. They wanted to do surgery. I had been to Mayo years ago for Parathyroid surgery so I went back for a second opinion. No blood disease was found and my lungs are being scanned every few months with, thus far, no more growth. They will have a day or two of testing then a diagnosis. Most hotels with drive you to the appointments . I can’t say enough good things about the whole experience and they LISTEN to you!! I was treated with respect and much kindness also. If it sounds really difficult it is not as difficult as trying to deal with appointments and doctors at home. I do hope you get relief and a proper diagnosis soon. My heart goes out to you for all you have been going through over the years. Keep us posted on your health journey.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 6:17 AM
  
  Thank you Christy I appreciate your information and your comment I did look into the Mayo Clinic in the beginning so nine years ago basically they wanted me for three weeks and that was just too much with all the animals, etc. as I mentioned I had a vet who had the same problem as me and she was a woman, and she had been to the mayo in Arizona and they couldn’t help her so I dismissed it. I think I’m gonna start with Stanford here and work my way over to UCSF if need be because now I’m just done it’s hard being the patient and doing all the research and following through and being able to show up it takes a lot of energy as you probably well ,know thank you!
  Xxx
Susie
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 4:39 AM

How disconcerting all of this must be for you!

I’m so glad to hear that second opinions with be forthcoming.

Remember, doctors are only “practicing” medicine.

Hugs!
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 6:14 AM
  
  Right!!
  Alittle CARE would go along way too. I wrote my MD two weeks ago now asking something and seeing if he could see the test results from the EEG. He got back to me 12 days after said he had been feeling under the weather and that I could call some number to leave a message. I found that very cold and unprofessional. Never mind he’s the one that told me I was in Heart failure a year ago and has never seen me or checked up on me. I realize they don’t have time, but even a pre-written note could be sent out, saying thinking of you. Hope everything‘s going well. Do you have any questions would go along long way For a person who is drowning in too much illness !
  XXX
rena.spain
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 4:35 AM

I don’t think anyone doesn’t like it when you talk about illness. I have already advised you not to do it, but I also understand that you would like to get in touch to get more information. But as with everything, the more you know, the more uncertain you become. Then you run from doctor to doctor, do examinations, take xxx pills that cause other problems. Therefore, I would like to advise you again: enjoy every day, drink your wine, your wonderful fairytale garden including the house and your animals. Really try to meditate for 10 minutes a day, maybe with an app guide if you can’t do it on your own, listen to good music and don’t think about the illness for a month. I’m sure it will help because all illnesses come from the psyche. All the best .
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 6:09 AM
  
  Rena Dear!
  I know you mean well but I don’t think about my illness daily. I just cope with it I don’t dwell on it my mind is clear and I really don’t want to think about it so setting a time to meditate would make me think about it just like taking one’s blood pressure daily and oxygen levels makes you think about oh yeah I’m sick so I don’t do that And believe you me it is not in my psyche and this is been going on for a long long time. I have just been noting it for the last 8 1/2 years before that I just ignored it and yes I get more information if I talk about it, which is a good thing !! the more information we have the better off we are. Plus, if I can help one other person by sharing my experience, that makes me feel good and by doing this for the last decade, I know I have helped quite a few people.
  - rena.spain
    · Reply
    
    March 30, 2024 at 10:06 AM
    
    Dear Elizabeth , What I wanted to express is not that you are mentally ill. Oh God no, that’s not how you behave. I see illness as spiritual in origin. And it’s like I said, the more you think about something or desire or talk about it, the more you attract it to yourself. Be it positive or negative. So no offense. I hope there is no misunderstanding my Dear.
    - LA CONTESSA
      · Reply
      
      Author
      
      March 30, 2024 at 4:43 PM
      
      Okay!
      Now I understand!
      Happy Easter!!
      Xxx
Rita
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 4:17 AM

Hoping you can find some answers soon. This has been going on for too long. Wishing you a Happy Easter. And maybe take Karen up on her invite, it may be just what you need.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 6:03 AM
  
  Yes I know!
  Plus I have a sister in law there too and a few friends hanging out in those Tuscan Hills!
  Baci
  Xxx
Robin
· Reply

March 28, 2024 at 4:17 AM

OH MY!!!
All of this , not encouraging for you, to be sure.
We are currently in Umbria, but I wish you could visit the clinic in Innsbruck. We have such confidence In the high level of care, in every department. This is why we purchased an apartment there and will be traveling back and forth. Competent Health care is so important!!!
Baci baci, R
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 6:02 AM
  
  I could NOT MAKE THIS STUFF Up I HAVE BEEN THROUGH!
  You landed in the RIGHT SPOT!
  You lucky AMERICAN!
  Xxx
Arell
· Reply

March 27, 2024 at 7:25 PM

Dear Contessa, I am so sorry that all of these health issues are still happening to you! My heart hurt when you said “Not anymore” about all of the big dreams you had. I am glad that you are going for second and third opinions though.
I tried the Calm app for a while and I liked it. It was just enough for me, did not take long, and it took me out of my head and into the moment with some breathing exercises. But it may not be everyone’s cup of tea.
I hope that you find some (better) answers regarding your health. Your garden is lovely and soothing.
- LA CONTESSA
  · Reply
  
  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 5:58 AM
  
  Are you my San Diego Arell?
  How are you and the baby? I’m not getting your feed I don’t know what happened. I will go look for you. thank you so much for sharing your calm experience. I’m sure it’s good for a lot of people but for me I don’t think about a whole lot during the day to be honest and I’m quite content with my home and my animals and my garden once spring time gets here and besides, I already paid a breathing coach big bucks couple years ago so I know those breathing techniques and I use them from time to time, so bottom line I’ve been down that path and I’m just so frustrated. The fact is I can never travel again by myself I fear and go to places I want to go. It’s hard for me to bend my head or turn my head without getting lightheaded even feeding the dog is an issue , I have become trapped in my own body but I will get more information and I will search all the people out that can possibly help me and I learned yesterday that FND was named in 2013. They changed it from DSM – five!So back in the day it was called hysteria. I think we all have a little bit of that in ourselves.Or I would HOPE!It means we have feelings and are ALIVE AND CARE!!!
  Xxx
Rachel A
· Reply

March 27, 2024 at 2:15 PM

Oh, Elizabeth… It sounds like there are more questions than answers. I’m glad you’re going to seek multiple opinions outside of Kaiser. Set as many appointments as you can—the healthcare system is so strained in the Bay Area! It took Martin 6 months to see a neurologist at Stanford and 9 months to see a neurologist at Palo Alto Medical Foundation.

And no, I do not think an app will cure what ails you. My sister-in-law saw how stressed out and falling apart I was getting and recommended both Calm and Headspace. I went along with it (figured why not? what’s the harm?) but I found I could clear my head more easily by listening to nature (like the creek, or frogs at night) and looking at something pretty (like the stars and satellites through the skylights, or the fur on my orange kittycat). Whereas looking at my phone tended to stress me out beyond the app itself. So your comment about how grounding and calming sweet Olaf and that garden are for you – that all rings true.

I felt awfully ignorant/foolish bringing that bottle of cab franc last month – NOT a great hostess’ gift in light of your health concerns! But maybe you can try it in May ??

Wishing your family a lovely Easter weekend!
- LA CONTESSA
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  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 5:51 AM
  
  Rachel,
  That was very kind of YOU!My Italian drinks red vino every night so it will be ENJOYED!
  Yes,I agree with you go OUTSIDE LISTEN AND SMELL THE ROSES!My head is EMPTY MOST DAYS I DONT DWELL!Now I need to make my daily list of to do’s so something gets DONE!The animals Serve me well and are a constant in my life of happiness joy and smiles, belly rubs, purring, touching to remind me it’s time to eat, and a big old Olaf, who hits my foot in the air to remind me he needs a brush out. I can’t imagine any app, giving me greater joy than what I already have, but that’s my opinion and I haven’t listened to it and I may listen to it just to see if I’m right !Then we TALK!Deal?
  Xxx
Princess Ginna
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March 27, 2024 at 12:11 PM

I am exhausted just reading about your trials! Having MS I totally understand what you’re going through. You just have to smile through it. I’m glad your menagerie keeps you entertained.
- LA CONTESSA
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  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 5:44 AM
  
  Appreciate your KINDNESS ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU ARE GOING THROUGH A DAILY WORKOUT!Wish we could head back to the blackberry bush FORT!Those were the days of tunnel making and pure JOY!
  Xxx
Margaret Sawyer
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March 27, 2024 at 11:13 AM

SEIZE THE DAY! I’m putting on earrings with no plans to leave the house. You inspire me. ????
- Margaret Sawyer
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  March 27, 2024 at 11:15 AM
  
  HEY! I put spring emojis, not question marks!!!!!
  - LA CONTESSA
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    Author
    
    March 27, 2024 at 11:28 AM
    
    For some reason the blog doesn’t take those little icons!
    Stick with EXCLAMATION MARKS!
- LA CONTESSA
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  Author
  
  March 28, 2024 at 5:41 AM
  
  You will SMILE EVERY TIME YOU PASS A MIRROR!
  I promise!
  Xxx
Margaret Sawyer
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March 27, 2024 at 11:12 AM

SEIZE THE DAY! I am putting on earrings with no plans to leave the house. You inspire me. ????
Margaret Sawyer
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March 27, 2024 at 11:11 AM

SEIZE THE DAY! I am putting on earrings with no plans to leave the house. You inspire me. ????
Sandra Sallin
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March 27, 2024 at 10:00 AM

Yes, this is ridiculous. You need to get a second or third opinion. I can’t believe that the expert on FND has never heard of this. It’s ridiculous. Go to a proper teaching hospital. Is it Stanford, UCSF, Mayo?
- LA CONTESSA
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  Author
  
  March 27, 2024 at 10:59 AM
  
  No I have not seen an EXPERT YET ON FND.
  That is on the Top of my to do list!My Pyscothetapist had never heard of it but she was not referred by Kaiser.I knew her from other events.
  XXX
- Gray
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  March 28, 2024 at 6:13 AM
  
  I agree with Sandra – this is ridiculous. You need more opinions. For them to take three weeks to get back to you…..with a recommendation to use the Calm app. Incredible. Look at the Mayo or Cleveland Clinic.
  The state of medicine is very scary.
  I just had simple surgery for a trigger finger. Everything went very well – quick recovery. Only the surgery didn’t fix the problem. So I paid $1200 copay and three weeks recovering for new scarring.
  Do not give up. Love you Contessa…
  - LA CONTESSA
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    Author
    
    March 29, 2024 at 7:10 AM
    
    My firstborn had trigger finger!His surgery was successful!That was done in Italy think I have described the hospital already!!Scary stuff back in time and you had to bring your own utensils and toilet paper!
    I’m SO SORRY about the repair gone bad!
    Honestly!!
    Big HUGS
    XXX
Karen
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March 27, 2024 at 9:53 AM

Oh dear Elizabeth, what a nightmare this all is honestly, I really feel for you.
And no real answers.
Good to come off the meds & take care of yourself you will soon notice if you aren’t quite right.
A glass of wine or two will be hugely relaxing for you I feel sure!
Enjoy your darling granddaughter & lovely Italian marito… & your wonderful garden & try & relax now & embrace the moment I would say! Sending Lots of Love from Tuscany & a reminder that you are always welcome at Settimo Cielo Retreat for some quality time out!~??XXX
- LA CONTESSA
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  March 27, 2024 at 11:00 AM
  
  Karen I just may show up!
  Keep my room ready and those hot cross buns coming!
  Xxx